Complain Corner

monkey jaw

3kinhead — Fri, 15 Jul 2011 03:33:41 +0000

my weird dreams are back. i miss those for quite some time already. this time around, it was weird and funny. but most of my dreams are weird and funny. it all started off with holidaying at a beach and the sea was calm and shockingly, i knew how to swim in there. i do not remember who were the ones there with me, but feels like my friends and also my colleagues altogether. on one part of the beach, there was this big tree house, suddenly appear on my left. and there was a pangolin up on the trees, throwing rocks at us. what the fuck. the rocks misses us by a few inches only. we were like under attack by the tenggiling monster.

suddenly out of nowhere, a gray gorilla/monkey appeared and he was chasing the pangolin around the tree house. the pangolin was hiding behind a door, as the gorilla/monkey walked into the room. he didn’t see the pangolin at first, then walked off. suddenly he felt something and went back into the room and turned the door behind. there was the pangolin hiding there, standing with its 2 legs. the gorilla put his hands on the pangolin’s face and tore its jaw off. threw the jaw into the sea where were we floating and watching all the action. the gorilla roared and jumped into the water, to swim and play with us. we didn’t dare to play with him, but we also didn’t wanna offend or make him angry.

after that, it was all messy dream with me locking Mel out from his hotel room. haha ya, weird how scenes suddenly changes like that

tell me about it

3kinhead — Thu, 05 May 2011 02:22:21 +0000

i am emotionally screwed up. beyond repair. you can take a puppy in front of me, and all i can think of is clay pot dog. rabbits hopping around the garden and i wait for a python to swallow them up. deers drinking by the river, crocodile comes chopping on their heads. how i love the blood.

unknown territory

3kinhead — Wed, 04 May 2011 17:09:36 +0000

i have stepped into a place which i am not very familiar with or i just do not remember at all. life has adjusted to a certain level of loneliness that has become part of me and my lifestyle. is this actually the reason for insecurity that i have within all this while? or is it just because of constant failure that i have been experiencing all this while, as in banging heads in the wall, or one hand clapping… that i have developed a wall within me.

people or magazines tell other people, that the meaning of life, is when you find someone to spend it together with. i can hardly find that true sometimes. i need some path that would lead me to how it was before. how i felt long long time ago… i can hear a song coming from that line someone sing with me…

Qing Ming Marathon

3kinhead — Sun, 03 Apr 2011 14:46:34 +0000

it feels like only yesterday, i talked about going on Qing Ming for 2 straight weeks. How time flies. How fast we age. How fast we change. At Batu Gantong today, that place felt like some big function going on. There were so many people that I thought we going to some fun fair. But though some crowd there were having some nice gathering with smiles on their faces, when seeing relatives who they normally only see during Chinese New Year, I saw another family with facial expression that ain’t that cheerful as others.

I ask a lady, started piling up the gold papers to burn. After she was done, someone passed her one big plastic bag, filled with children clothes. One after another, she was putting them on the gold papers to burn together. They looked like 6 to 8 year old clothes. After that, a box of toys.

I surely cannot imagine how the lady was feeling at that moment. But I sure feel it was a sad picture right there at the moment. But, when I walked pass the fire burning of the clothes and toys, I thought to myself, “crap, I am smelling burning plastic”

everything takes time. but how long?

3kinhead — Wed, 23 Mar 2011 14:09:37 +0000

For so many years, I was being hopeful and directionless in seeking the unseen divine. Not only one, but all there is around me or as I passes any. There will always be one thing only that I pray of, whenever I pass any of those holiness, regardless of any race, that my family will always have good health. That any case like what we experienced before, do not occur another Round 2 at us.

But no. If there really is someone up there, he or she is really playing a trick on some of us. Now, I just hold back my palms from being clasped together and pray for emptiness. I feel like now I can really be called an Atheist.

a real tearjerker…

3kinhead — Wed, 02 Mar 2011 13:57:50 +0000

so proud of that one of us has one of those already. a big step on the route of life. hope parenthood will bring more joy than partying at koh samui with the gang.

minimum

3kinhead — Mon, 07 Feb 2011 07:30:09 +0000

i recently found out that to be a playboy, one need the least minimum requirement set of wheels is honda civic or maybe a 3 series. anything lower than that, don’t even hope of getting any respond from girls. girls would go “eww” at anything else below than level. oh my, i need to get a new set of wheels in order to get some action going. like my friend said, we all don’t have 3 or 5 series. we have 4 and 5 series only. that is from samsung. i wonder if that counts.

did you know…

3kinhead — Mon, 31 Jan 2011 11:41:37 +0000

there is this uncle, working as a helper at New World Park foodcourt, selling laksa. the stall owner is a mean looking lady, and they do not seem to look busy with lots of business. this uncle, has a different face, which makes him look like grinning all the time, like a happy child. but there was one day, i just saw him there, sitting there, being scold by the lady boss. his face still stucked with that grin, but i saw so much sadness in his eyes. the lady boss scolded her like a mad dog barking. the more i see that scenario, the more it hurts, when i see that uncle’s smiling face and eyes full of sadness. i have seen him since i started studying at college nearby, like 10 years ago. the first time i saw him, i felt he was creepy. but that incident made me see how much sadness there is in his eyes, a life of someone like him, still working hard labour to make ends meet. i really hope he is just working to fill up his free time.

again, i have to say, i am attracted to all these bitterness in life and my surrounding, like a magnet. but it has been a long time since i have these bittersweet feeling in me. something my mom said triggered it. she sometimes bring up some sad stories of hard times, when my dad was going through chemo. my mom always fetches him to mount miriam for the treatment. after my dad’s passing, when my mom drives alone to settle some government document stuff, she can suddenly speak outloud from her mind and then turn to the empty seat beside her, talking or asking the thin air, expecting my dad was sitting there. but it was still empty. that story hurt so much on the inside, like the pinhead monster did the stabbing with his nails to my chest.

make every moment counts. one never know who will be taken away from us one day. make every moment count.

pathetic-me

3kinhead — Sun, 12 Dec 2010 14:53:28 +0000

hopelessly looking for one

after dinner walk

3kinhead — Wed, 01 Dec 2010 16:20:12 +0000

i miss having one at home. i see most people has one to go home to, while i can only reminisce of those time i requested for a after dinner walk, downstairs our old place. there was this big open space, where you sometimes can see kids playing badminton with imaginary netting. old grandmothers and grandfathers having their evening walk as they look upon their grandchildren cycling their bikes with 2 supported wheels, and imagining them grow old and graduate from university, find a good job and a wife to share their lives as how they did.

not forgetting the stall selling fried bee hoon mee which we normally call “pokkai bee hoon” meaning, bankrupt mee. and their hot steamy red bean dessert. ahh! those were some of the food i grew up with. and voila! my 90kg body frame.

anyway, after my dinner today, i walked around my apartment alone, but i don’t see any family around the pool or the garden. not so cheerful as what i experienced those days. or maybe i was too indulged in my work, that i actually had my dinner way later than others, and my after dinner walk, is kinda like time for the families to enjoy tv shows.

sigh, i miss him. don’t know why, but today i suddenly really miss him. no way of turning back time, to relive those moments with him, and cherish every second when he comes home. but i know i love those time, when he call us up, to meet him downstairs for a cup of coffee, after a hard days work for him.

who do i call? who would call me? this is so depressing.