flowers

most of the good and bad, i’ve seen everything
feelings of love and hate within me coexist
at times, your eyes sparkle brightly in the night
if not, i’ll find you by smoke from your dunhill light

take a dive into the unknown with me just abit
myself would not know how bottom is the pitt
together we’ll go thru life and solve our trouble
give me a chance to prove we are good as couple

best friends or not, i would love to try
it’s up to you, if you feel i’m worth your time
i’m afraid, but i’m sure you are more scared
if it’s time you need, time i will give, no sweat

numb

the alcohol intake has been free flowing over the night and yet still not forgetable drunk. i will still remember every tap sound of the keyboard i am making right now. every sip of the beer and the satisfaction sound i make after one long sip. the urge to drink more grows even though the bitter level ain’t dropping any further. drowning one’s sorrow with beer seems to be the best solution for now. i would not say it’s a sorrow i am trying to kill, but just indecisiveness that has been bugging the back of my mind recently. i do not know how the green eye monster suddenly appear out of nowhere. do i need to tame that monster and resume to the way it was before? or do i proceed with that monster and fight it for a better cause. a cause which i myself am not sure wether i should embark in the journey. the feelings i have just doesn’t feel strong enough for me to do things blindly, but yet, the caring and missing feel still remains. do i feel that feeling and fall into the pitt of love and see how far the rabbit hole takes me? or do i ignore it and go on with my life without cherishing any moments that i had before or even feelings that i should discover. let not this be statement written with my eyes half open, or should i say, half closed. let this be the wake up moment and the next morning, i would know what i should do next and not just hang in limbo. thank you very much for making it not happen at all.

Cakap2

… need smile

don’t wanna talk about him, please don’t make me remember my dream… or maybe it’s sign? or was it just a nightmare?… fuck life

B-side

the cold breeze of the post-rain night
lost feeling, will never be ignite
though the addiction is there to crave
please some hit me dead in the head
the beauty of the night must not stop
but that sad craving should never be top

i am lost of words in a smiling night
no pain to blurt the rubbish as i might
sailing in a group with the wind of norm
trying to keep myself sane for long
gonna brace another day with that mask
the one i have grown accustomed to to last